Jack And The Beanstalk Version 3


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The village of Wheyside is being terrorised by the Giant Blunderbore, aided by his henchman Fleshcreep.

When dairy-owner Dame Trott, can’t pay up, she sells her cow Daisy, to raise the rent money. But her son Jack is tricked into selling Daisy to Fleshcreep for a bag of beans. Daisy is taken away to the Giant’s castle in the clouds, along with Jack’s girlfriend, Jill.

Jack must find a way to rescue them before they become giant snacks. Cue a giant beanstalk.


10 principals plus a Giant, a pantomime cow and a chorus.


All our scripts have a runtime of approximately 2hrs (not including any interval) but this is very dependent on your own production and can be edited by yourselves to suit your own needs.


Our pantomimes all come with a full, suggested songs, music cues and SFX list.


Traditional British pantomime, incorporating visual comedy, slapstick and audience participation.

Free Sample




Buttercup The Cow
Mavis The Giant’s Cook
The Giant [voice over]
Dancers; Villagers; Ghosts; Slaves; etc.



Trott’s dairy is [USR] and adjoining it is a cowshed with a practical door. Music cue 2: Chorus. After song ends…Exit Chorus [SR]

Enter Simon [SL]

SIMON: Hiya folks! I’m Simon Trott now, who wants to be on my team? Great! And as I’m the team leader you must do everything I say, starting now. Simon says, turn to the person on your left and say, ‘I like you in a very special way’. And now, turn to the person on your right and say, ‘I like you in a special way too.’ There, that should help keep things nice and friendly.

GIANT: Fee-fi-fo-fum!

SIMON: You’re a big pain in the bum! That’s Blunderbore the giant who lives in a big castle above the clouds. It beats me how it stays up there seeing as how clouds are just condensed water. I’m guessing it must be some sort of magic keeping it from falling down.

GIANT: Fee-fi-fo-fum!Fleshcreep, fill my empty tum!

SIMON: Fleshcreep’s the giant’s slave and he’s a real nasty piece of work.

Enter Jack [SR]

JACK: Hiya Simon!

SIMON: Hi, Jack!

JACK: Who were you talking to just now?

SIMON: Just my new team Jack.

JACK: [looking out] You’ve got a big one today, Simon.

SIMON: I don’t like to brag Jak, but speaking of big ones, I’ve just been telling everybody about the nasty giant.

JACK: I hope you haven’t been frightening them Simon.

SIMON: No Jack, the giant will do that all by himself.

JACK: Let’s forget about the giant and talk about nice things instead.

SIMON: Like what for instance?

JACK: Like me being in love. [hand on heart]

SIMON: All right Jack, who is she this time?

JACK: Her name’s Jill. [sighs]

SIMON: You don’t feel a sudden urge to go up a hill with her to fetch water, do you?

JACK: No Simon, why do you ask?

SIMON: No reason really.

JACK: Jill’s the daughter of Squire Moneybags, and I’ve asked her to marry me.

SIMON: That’s a bit quick, isn’t it? Even for a panto.

JACK: It’s the real thing this time Simon.

SIMON: It always is with you Jack.

JACK: The only problem is her father insists that she marries somebody rich.

SIMON: That lets you out then.

JACK: But I love her terribly Simon.

SIMON: Then maybe you ought to practice a bit more.

JACK: I’d like to, but it’s not easy with her father watching her every move.

SIMON: It’s probably your moves he’s more worried about.

JACK: And how’s your love life these days Simon?

SIMON: My new girlfriend thinks I’m a bit of a stalker.

JACK: I didn’t even know you had a girlfriend.

SIMON: She’s not technically my girlfriend.

JACK: What do you mean Simon?

SIMON: Well, I haven’t actually asked her out yet.

JACK: No wonder she thinks you’re a stalker.

SIMON: When will I get to meet this Jill?

JACK: She said she might call round later.

SIMON: What’s she like around cranky old cows?

JACK: I’m sure her and mum will get along just fine.

SIMON: I meant Buttercup, Jack.

JACK: She’s bound to love Buttercup just as much as we do, Simon.

SIMON: Nobody could love her more than mum, though.

JACK: I think she loves that old cow more than she does us.

SIMON: You could you right, Jack. I remember when Buttercup had a cold, and mum gave her my bed and made me sleep in the cowshed.

Enter Jill [SR]

JACK: Jill!

JILL: Jack!

JACK: I’ve missed you terribly Jill.

JILL: And I’ve missed you terribly, Jack.

SIMON: When was the last time you saw each other?

JACK: About half an hour ago.

SIMON: Half an hour ago!

JILL: We hate being apart even for a minute.

JACK: [smoochy] I love you Jilly willy.

JILL: [smoochy] And I love you Jacky wacky.

SIMON: [aside] I feel sicky-wicky. See you later team! [waves and exits inside]

JACK: Did you tell your father about us getting married Jill?

JILL: Yes Jack.

JACK: And what did he say?

JILL: He said, over his dead body.

JACK: So, he’s not totally against the idea then?

JILL: Yes, he is Jack! He still insists that I marry somebody rich.

JACK: Don’t worry Jill, I have a feeling I’m going to make my fortune very soon.

JILL: I hope you’re right, Jack. Not marrying you would break my heart.

JACK: Mine too Jill. Music cue 3: Jack and Jill. After song ends…

Enter Squire Moneybags [SL]

SQUIRE: I thought I might find you here Jill.

JILL: Hello father, me and Jack were just talking about you.

SQUIRE: You shouldn’t be talking to Jack Trott about anything.

JACK: Why not, Squire?

SQUIRE: I only want the best for my daughter, and that isn’t you Jack Trott.

JILL: But father, I love Jack.

SQUIRE: Well, you can just unlove him. He’s nothing but a poor dairy boy.

JACK: I might be poor now, but I have great prospects.

SQUIRE: Rubbish! Trott’s Dairy’s on its knees, just like your mother was this morning.

JACK: I beg your pardon?

SQUIRE: I saw her in the bank earlier begging the manager for a loan.
JILL: And did he give her one?

SQUIRE: Nobody in their right mind would give her one. Where is she, anyway?