Dick Whittington Version 2



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Simple country boy Dick Whittington makes his way from his village in Gloucester, to the bright lights of London seeking his fortune. accompanied by Puss, his feline companion.

Dick soon discovers that the streets of London aren’t paved with gold, and instead ends up doing battle with the evil King Rat who intends to rule London with his hordes of rats.

King Rat frames Dick as a thief and he leaves London bound for Morocco. This battle between good and evil, eventually culminates in the Sultan of Morocco’s palace. Dick then returns a hero, marries Alice and becomes Mayor of London.


10 principals plus several minor cameo and speaking roles and a chorus.


All our scripts have a runtime of approximately 2hrs (not including any interval) but this is very dependent on your own production and can be edited by yourselves to suit your own needs.


Our pantomimes all come with a full, suggested songs, music cues and SFX list.


Traditional British pantomime, incorporating visual comedy, slapstick and audience participation.

Free Sample




Dancers; Londoners; Sailors; Harem girls; Guards; etc.




Fitzwarren’s shop is [USL] Music Cue 3: Chorus. After song ends…Exit Chorus [SR]

Enter Jack [SL]

JACK: Hiya boys and girls, I’m Jack! I work in Alderman Fitzwarren’s shop and I’m madly in love with his daughter Alice. I once asked if she’d go out with me, and she replied, when ‘pigs fly Jack.’ Now I’m just waiting for genetic engineering to catch up. I like taking regular naps in the stockroom, but when I’m asleep I always snore. So, if you hear me snoring I want you all to shout, wake up Jack, and then I’ll wake up and won’t get caught. And whenever I come on I’ll shout, wakey wakey, to wake any of you that’s fallen asleep. Which is quite likely judging by this script. I’ll shout wakey wakey, and you shout back, thanks Jack! Let’s try it then [shouts] Wakey, wakey! Well done. [yawns] I’m off for a little nap, see you all later. [exits inside]

Enter Alice from shop.

ALICE: Hello everybody! Welcome to old London town. I’m Alice Fitzwarren, and you’ve picked a lovely day to drop by. The sun is shining and everybody’s happy, despite the ongoing rat problem. My father is just inside his shop, finalising a cargo of jellied eels ready to deliver to the Sultan of Morocco. It seems he developed a taste for them after visiting the 2012 Olympics.

Enter Alderman Fitzwarren from shop.

FITZWARREN: Good morning, Alice!

ALICE: Good morning father, is everything ready for tomorrow’s voyage?

FITZWARREN: I’m afraid not Alice.

ALICE: How come?

FITZWARREN: I haven’t had any replies to my advert for sailors to crew my ship.

ALICE: That’s strange, London Docks are usually full of sailors looking to get off.

FITZWARREN: If we don’t have a crew by tomorrow, I’ll have to cancel our trip.

ALICE: But you said this trip would be make or break for Fitzwarren’s Stores.

FITZWARREN: It’s true Alice. The Sultan’s order will help make up for what the rats have cost me in lost stock. If only we could get rid of them for good.

ALICE: Why don’t you ask Jack to buy stronger rat poison?

FITZWARREN: I would if I could ever manage to find him.

ALICE: Have you checked in the stockroom?

FITZWARREN: Yes, and he wasn’t there.

ALICE: Did you listen out for snoring?

FITZWARREN: Yes, but all I heard were rats squeaking.

ALICE: Come on father, I’ll help you look for him.

FITZWARREN: Thanks Alice.

Exit Fitzwarren and Alice into shop.

Enter Dick and Puss [SL]

DICK: Here we are at last Puss, in the city where the streets are paved with gold.

PUSS: I thought this was London, not Eldorado.

Enter Chorus Member [SR]

DICK: Pardon me, but where I can find the nearest street paved with gold?

CHORUS M: Are you serious mate?

DICK: Yes, I can’t wait to dig some up and get rich.

CHORUS M: You’ll have a bloomin’ long wait.

DICK: What do you mean?

CHORUS M: The streets of London aren’t paved with gold!

DICK: They aren’t!?

CHORUS M: Of course not, you numpty! [exits laughing]

DICK: I feel stupid for believing all those Facebook posts now, Puss.

PUSS: I did try warning you.

DICK: Come on Puss, we’re heading straight back to Gloucester.

PUSS: Suits me master.

They turn to exit [SL]

Music cue 4: Enter Bowbells [SR] dings wand. Music cue 5: Dick and Puss freeze.

BOWBELLS: Dick Whittington, we all believe in you,

Not myth or fiction, your tale is true.

Please stay here and don’t get down,

And you’ll become Mayor of London town. [dings wand Music cue 6: exits]

Dick and Puss unfreeze.

DICK: On second thoughts Puss, I think I’ll stay here and look for a job instead.

PUSS: That was a quicker U-turn than a politician!

DICK: [produces a mobile] I’ll just check my Job Search app and see what’s available. [taps screen]

PUSS: I’m hungry. I’ll scrounge some food from that shop there, nobody can resist a cute little pussy. [meows outside shop]

Enter Alice from shop.

ALICE: Hello Puss! My, aren’t you a cutie! Where’s your master? [Puss goes to speak] I think I can see him. [to Dick] Excuse me, but is this your cat?

Dick and Alice come face-to-face and are instantly smitten.

SFX: Bells chime.

DICK: Why Miss, is he bothering you in any way whatsoever?

ALICE: No, but I think he might be hungry.

PUSS: Ravenous would be a better description.

ALICE: [to Dick] You said that without moving your lips.

DICK: That wasn’t me, that was my cat.

ALICE: [laughs] A talking cat? You’d have to be crazy to believe in a talking cat!

DICK: [laughs] Yeah you would. No, I was actually practicing my ventriloquist act.

ALICE: I must say you’re very good at it.

DICK: [Puss goes to speak, but Dick covers his mouth] No, Puss is just a normal non-speaking cat, nothing special about him whatsoever.

PUSS: [sarcastic] Meow! [moves away in a huff]

DICK: I’m Dick by the way, what’s your name?

ALICE: I’m Alice Fitzwarren, and that’s my father’s shop just there.

DICK: Pleased to meet you Alice, I’m Dick and I’ve just arrived from Gloucester.

ALICE: And what brings you to London Dick?

DICK: I’ve come here to make my fortune.

ALICE: We have lots of people coming here expecting to find the streets paved with gold. Can you imagine anybody being that stupid, Dick?

DICK: [covering] Hah! They’d have to be pretty stupid, wouldn’t they?

PUSS: Almost as stupid as somebody who believes in talking cats.