The Grinch The Panto


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The Grinch has been banished from the town of Whoville, but he eventually returns to wreak his revenge.

Armed with the Harry Potter Big Book Of Magic Spells and masquerading as Santa Claus, he sets out to cause mayhem and ruin Christmas. Santa enlists the Snow Queen’s help, to save Christmas. However, the Grinch is finally won over by the wide-eyed innocence of a kind young girl, and a little help from the Spirit of Christmas.

A parody of the famous character created by Dr Seuss, woven into a traditional British-style pantomime.


8 principals plus several smaller roles, some cameo roles and a chorus.


All our scripts have a runtime of approximately 2hrs (not including any interval) but this is very dependent on your own production and can be edited by yourselves to suit your own needs.


Our pantomimes all come with a full, suggested songs, music cues and SFX list.


Traditional British pantomime, incorporating visual comedy, slapstick and audience participation.

Free Sample




Snow Queen
Pizza Courier
Dancers; Elves; Who’s; Echoes; Bats; Imps; Chuckleleers; etc.



Music cue 2: Chorus. After song ends…

Enter Annie [SR]

ANNIE: Good morning everybody!

CHORUS: Good morning Annie!

ANNIE: Are you all looking forward to Christmas Day?

CHORUS: Yes Annie!

ANNIE: And have you all made out your presents lists for Santa?

CHORUS: Yes Annie!

ANNIE: Well, I hope you all get what you’ve asked for.

Music cue 3: Enter Nora [SL] with a shopping bag full of presents.

ANNIE: Hello Aunt Nora, have you been out Christmas shopping?

NORA: Yes Annie, and I’ve bought some lovely presents for your Aunt Flo’s kids.

ANNIE: What did you get them?

NORA: Electric hair clippers, a cordless drill and a home waxing kit.

ANNIE: But none of those things are suitable for little kids Nora!

NORA: I’m sure the little dears will find a good use for them Annie.

ANNIE: That’s what I’m afraid of. Luckily they can rely on Santa for some sensible gifts.

NORA: Santa!? [laughs] Don’t make me laugh, Annie.

ANNIE: Don’t you believe in Santa, Nora?

NORA: Is snow, white? Santa’s just a filament of people’s imaginations.

ANNIE: I bet all the boys and girls believe in Santa.

NORA: And I’ll bet they don’t.

ANNIE: Boys and girls, on the count to three I want everybody who believes in Santa to shout, ‘Santa,’ as loud as you can.

NORA: And everybody who doesn’t believe in Santa shout, ‘Christmas crackers!’

ANNIE: After three. One…two…three!

NORA: I won!

ANNIE: Oh no, you didn’t, there were more shouts for Santa.

NORA: Rubbish, Annie, most of them are crackers.

Enter Mayor [SL]

MAYOR: Good morning ladies and a merry Christmas to you both.

ANNIE: Merry Christmas Mr Mayor.

NORA: Hello Cecil. [toying with his chain] If I pulled your chain, would you flush?

MAYOR: [slaps her hand away] Stop playing with my regalia!

NORA: I never touched your regalia.

MAYOR: [hands a letter to Nora] This is for you Nora.

NORA: [excited] Is it a special marriage licence!?

MAYOR: No, it’s an exclusion order.

NORA: You mean, it excludes other women from bothering you?

MAYOR: No, just you.

NORA: Don’t you find me strangely attractive, Cecil?

MAYOR: No, I find you strange and unattractive.

NORA: But I have everything a man could ever want.

MAYOR: Yes, a hairy chest, bulging biceps and a thick moustache?

NORA: I like a man with a sense of humour.

MAYOR: And I like a woman with a sense of shape.

NORA: Then you’re in luck, because I have the perfect shape.

MAYOR: For a blancmange perhaps.

NORA: You remind me of that handsome actor, Leonardo De Caprio.

MAYOR: And you remind me of a box of chocolates.

NORA: Is that because I’m sweet and tasty?

MAYOR: No, it’s because by the time I get to the bottom, I feel sick.

NORA: I never eat chocolate. [posing] I like to watch my figure.

MAYOR: It must be like watching a horror movie unfolding.

NORA: I could go off you.

MAYOR: [pleads] When!?

NORA: [holds mistletoe over Mayor] Would you like to kiss me under the mistletoe Cecil?

MAYOR: I wouldn’t kiss you under general anaesthetic.

NORA: Either way you’d discover I’m a knockout. [coughs roughly]

ANNIE: That’s a nasty cough, Nora.

NORA: I always seem to get a sore throat at Christmas, Annie.

ANNIE: Have you seen a doctor about it?

NORA: Yes, I have.

ANNIE: And what did they say?

NORA: They said I was suffering from Tinsleitis. [laughs] Tinsleitis? Please yourselves.

ANNIE: Have you posted your letter to Santa yet, Mr Mayor?

MAYOR: Yes Annie, I sent it off to the North Pole ages ago.

NORA: If you ask me, you both want your heads testing.

ANNIE: Aunt Nora doesn’t believe in Santa Mr Mayor.

MAYOR: Then maybe this will convince her. [produces a letter and reads] ‘To all Whovillers, young and old. I’ve looked at my list and checked it twice, and I promise to deliver all the presents you’ve asked for this year. Yours truly, Santa. Ho-ho-ho! P.S. I love mince pies and the reindeer love carrots.’ There you are Nora, proof positive that Santa really does exist.

NORA: Well, he won’t be coming down my chimney.

ANNIE: What makes you so sure Nora?

NORA: I live in a flat.

MAYOR: Santa has a magic key that opens any door.

NORA: So, do I and it’s called a gold credit card now, if you’ll excuse me I have some serious shopping to do.

ANNIE: Christmas isn’t all about shopping, Aunt Nora.

NORA: You could’ve fooled me now, come and help me in the good old Christmas tradition of maxing-out credit cards. [coy wave] I’ll see you later Cecil.